Target is a tough place to be

If I’m completely honest the last couple of days have been something of a disappointment when it comes to weight and self perception.

They’ve been very positive and upbeat days otherwise – but my dreams haven’t been great lately so I know that deep down I’m bothered by not just this but a couple of other things too.

When I last posted on Saturday morning in group I was pretty happy – having stepped on the scales (twice just to make sure) and was greeted by the news that I was just about back in target.

The following day however (after eating only plums, salad and weetabix with frozen fruit) the scales told a totally different story.

What the effing eff?! They’ve never let me down like this before and I seriously cannot account for where another eight flipping pounds has appeared from.

This can’t happen overnight – which leads me to think that this is either fluid retention or the scales were telling me total lies on Saturday morning.

I stepped off, stepped on again and saw the same – just like the day before.

Cue a mini self effacing meltdown and several ranty texts to Angie where I railed against the injustice of it all.

The mad thing is that I usually know when this is going to happen. My body feels a certain way and certain ‘snug’ shirts usually tug a little at the waist.

At the moment everything shirt wise fits perfectly – and if anything I feel trimmer than usual.

That’s not reflected on Slimming World’s scales though – which show that despite some serious hard work this week I’m still not back in target.

Now – I almost typed ‘I’ve only lost a pound’ – but the truth of it is that I’ve told so many people at various meetings that there is no such thing as only losing anything.

You either lose or you don’t – and even a maintain is a victory, so I’m going to have to begrudgingly accept my own advice, reframe the narrative and take it on the chin.

Woohoo!!!

I lost a pound!!!

(Note – the author is still not feeling it – but he is working on it)

So – where is the smoking gun?

I’m not in diet mode – and I’m eating all the right foods – but if I’m brutally honest I’m also struggling with portion sizes.

However I’ve been mitigating this by mostly eating SP food.

I’ve also done a lot of exercise.

Since last Monday I’ve swum almost 9km and walked 63 miles.

I’m not blaming this on muscle gain mind you – but the exercise may well have a lot to do with why things feel trimmer.

Anyway – I have to get ready – I have a busy working day ahead of me and I need to get ready.

My next weigh in will be a Saturday in just under two weeks time (thanks to an ever changing work and personal life schedule) so I have to make sure that I remain committed and focused in the meantime.

Sigh.

This being at target business can be a tough place at the best of times – but currently I’m definitely feeling the (entirely self applied) pressure.

I see the 2019 SW MOTY handover point on the horizon and it’s less than a month away.

In the next few weeks so much change (almost all good) is happening that I don’t know what to think about first!!!

Davey

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12 comments

  1. Hmm.. Since you said you were having bad dreams, I am wondering if being that might have influenced our weight. Apparently you weigh more when you are tired (as someone with fatigue issues I know that this is actually true). So it might very well be that you will discover you have lost more after a good night of rest. And if not… you have at least lost a pound 😀 Still waaayyy better than a gain and also beats no loss at all.

    As an expert on nightmares and “busy” dreams, might I share something that I did during a clinical trial to help me with my nightmares? If you notice a recurring theme in your dreams, try to remember one of your nightmares. Then visualize/ relive that nightmare before you go to bed for about 3 nights in a row. This isn’t particularly pleasant, but it’s for a good cause. After those three nights, take your nightmare and change the ending, so it ends on a positive note and you actually feel relieved. Like someone comes to your aid and makes it alright again. Make sure you imagine that at the end you are with someone you trust and allow yourself to express the feeling of relief (either by crying or sipping some champagne). Do this for about a week and the nightmares should get less. I felt really silly doing this, but in the end it really did keep the nightmares at bay for a while (after which it is a matter of rinse repeat).

    Example of what I did: I dreamed of being chased by a vampire and then having to save the world (which is kind of my thing in my dreams: save everyone!). So I imagined Van Helsing showing up and taking care of everything for me haha.

    Hopefully this could help :).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oddly the themes don’t reoccur and I’m at a bit of a loss when I try to remember all but one of them.

      None of them could really be described as nightmares but they also don’t fit into the ‘pleasant dream’ category either!

      Like

      1. Oh those are the worst. They are all over the place and you just don’t wake up rested. 😦 I’m afraid I don’t have much advise for those kind of dreams. Perhaps it would be a good idea to journal very shortly before you go to bed to write down what you might feel anxious about so it doesn’t bother you in the middle of the night?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Awh I know dear, but what I meant was that sometimes it can stop something from recurring in your dreams when you have written it out just before you go to sleep. Though it doesn’t work for anyone. I hope your stress levels reduce massively soon. Sending you loads of virtual hugs and if you need anything, you have my number :).

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Just don’t get discouraged! You know (yes… you do) that things right themselves, week on week. What seems like an injustice in one week will rebalance in the next week. Just so long as you don’t drop that ball in the meantime. Just hang in there and you will see your efforts rewarded on the scales. You will. You will. You will. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the encouragement 😊

      As much as I can trot out blogging wisdom when I’m in a good place with things I definitely need the love when (like now) positivity is a precious commodity.

      However – things in the MOST SIGNIFICANT area of my life (that’s no longer related to numbers on scales) are all ticketty boo – so in that respect I have absolutely zero complaints!

      Hoping things are also ticketty boo for you too 😊

      Liked by 2 people

  3. If I didn’t know better I’d say it was your star week! Seriously though how frustrating when it’s totally out of character for your body. Bet your bottom dollar it’ll be off next week though, so hang on in there 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

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