Armour

Where does the time go?!

It seems to be passing through my fingers like water at the moment and I have no idea how it’s flying by so quickly!

I guess it’s a consequence of being employed full time again that ‘life’ is being crammed into ever decreasing little slots peppered around evenings and weekends.

This weekend is one where I have more time than usual on my hands (not necessarily a good thing in my experience) and I have no travelling at all to do.

This is pretty useful from a shopping point of view though – because my early morning bargain hunting habits at Aldi (which have been neglected for a long time!) were at the front and centre of my mind when I woke up this morning.

It never used to be unusual for me to be patiently waiting outside at 7.55am with my trolly at the ready whilst bopping back and forth to some upbeat tunes on my AirPods.

Today because I was able to get there super early I LOADED my basket with red sticker bargains (anything with one of these beauties is HALF PRICE) and now have enough meat in my freezer to feed a small army.

I did spend a little more than I planned to though – but hey ho. It’s all relative and at least I didn’t lose the plot in Waitrose!

To underline that I was shopping at the right place an unexpected benefit jumped out at me when I found the last few of these on the shelf.

It’s probably considered sacrilege if you’re a true Nespresso addict to buy 3rd party pods – but since Aldi sell 10 for £1.69 for vs £5 for official ‘speciality’ ones (and I can’t honestly tell the difference) I really can’t recommend the more expensive alternative with a clear conscience.

The caramel ones in particular seem to be rarer than rocking horse poop and consequently I swept the lot of them into my basket as soon as I saw them on the shelf.

Even if you stick to the standard pods it’s still £2.30 dearer to buy a pack of 10 direct from Nespresso.

These are therefore a flipping bargain!!!

The only guilt I harbour about buying them is that from an ecological perspective the disposable plastic in the 3rd party pods from supermarkets are crap of the highest order.

Nespresso have the right idea about recycling the aluminium in the ones that they sell and making it (theoretically) ‘easy’ to do so.

However I placed that descriptor in inverted commas for a reason.

If like me you’ve ever tried to return the aluminium ones via the couriers that drop the Nespresso pod deliveries off you’ll realise that they first of all don’t like filling their vans with recycling and secondly the drivers look at you like you’re Jimmy Saville if you insist that they take something that they’ve already been contracted to pick up on the order form.

It’s both stressful and annoying when they refuse and the whole situation of continual doorstep conflict eventually made me move away from their ‘solution’ and never go back.

Being skint helped too.

That was admittedly the final deciding factor.

I needed a nice coffee today more than ever if I’m honest – and these definitely fitted the bill. The one in the picture represented my third shot – and after a slightly slower than normal feeling when I awoke today I finally had a nice ‘get up and go’ buzz in my head.

On most days (since my heath improved)  I have this buzz regardless of whether I have coffee or not – but the last two nights have been characterised by a distinct lack of sleep.

I’m not having nightmares – but my thoughts are definitely unsettled at the moment and I’m having a silly recurring dream about my phone breaking into loads of little bits.

It will pass though.

I know why these thoughts are present and truthfully they’re not there for a bad reason. The future has never seemed brighter and I can’t seem to get aspects of it out of my mind. I can be pretty obsessive at times and although I can put this trait to good use if I bend it to my will it also means that I often overthink both the bad and the good things in life.

There are ways of diverting my attention though – and Slimming World is one of them.

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Although I didn’t weigh in today (since I only have to do this every 8 weeks now and I have decided to not stress and pressure myself every week) it was wonderful to see everyone and hear Angie chat to the group.

Saturdays have become increasingly difficult for me and what used to be something I went to religiously is now something that’s unfortunately more and more sporadic.

Even though I’ve been going to Angie’s groups for over three years (I started in April 2016) there’s always something new to learn and I never fail to walk away feeling anything less than positive.

It’s not just her though. The group raffle was won by a lovely regular there who I always have a good chuckle with – and since she’s not a huge fan of cooking she gave her winnings to me!

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How nice was that of her?!

I plan to cook it tomorrow and post a picture on the group’s page – so let’s hope I don’t screw it up!

Shortly after the meeting I headed out for a walk with another friend and had a wander around some shops in town, where we both found a couple of little bargains.

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I couldn’t resist these cufflinks (£4!) even though at the moment I don’t have a pressing need to wear any.

They represent something far more than a shirt sleeve fastening though – and when I put them on I will have a very personal reason for wearing them.

I know that they will make me feel happy because of that and these are special occasion cufflinks – meant to be worn when I need to feel confident and as if I’m not doing something on my own.

It sounds daft but these cufflinks are going to be armour.

I need it sometimes too – because whilst I feel that things are going well (better in fact than they ever have before in my entire life) tonight I can’t help dwelling upon moments where I should have done things differently in the past.

My choices led me down so many dark paths, and I slowed my progress in life more than I should have. In many respects I can’t completely blame myself for all of the daft decisions I took – but I wish I’d woken up to the reality of what I was becoming a lot earlier.

Now when I look at the changes that I want to carry on making it sometimes seems like I’ve wasted too much time – and that the journey to get to where I want to be will not only be harder still but really lengthy as well.

Still – no-one ever said that things worth having come easily, and having seen the capabilities and history of those close to me recently I realise that I need to make more effort to improve myself.

I’ve fixed the body and now it’s time for the mind, and if (in less than two years) I can move from this man:

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To this man:

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…then there’s nothing I can’t accomplish.

Davey

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14 comments

  1. You’re right – there’s nothing that can’t be accomplished… except perhaps recycling of Nespresso capsules! I had to chuckle at your experience. I haven’t tried the pick-up route, having heard it was… challenging. Instead, I took my first batch of capsules to my local CollectPlus outlet, where the Nespresso website cheerfully tells me they will print an address label from my QR code and… bingo! Not so easy as it happens. The grump behind the counter indeed printed the label, but this was as far as he was prepared to go. Handing it back to me, he said ‘Nespresso doesn’t pay me to use my Sellotape. You have to go home and stick the label on with your own Sellotape then bring it back’. I kid you not. I. Kid. You. Not. My look of shocked incredulity and semi-pathetic (and grossly, wilfully manipulative) ‘just this once’ pleading eventually embarrassed this Scrooge sufficiently that he ‘gave’ me the necessary four inches of Sellotape. I won’t make the same mistake again. Now I print the labels at home (my electricity, my printer, my ink…) and stick them to the green bags myself (with MY Sellotape!!).

    Like

    1. Hahaha – it looks like there’s friction in every part of the recycling model!!

      It’s galling, because as a consumer I want to do the right thing – but I genuinely can’t afford the cost and was frustrated by the whole experience.

      You could (rightly) argue however that there are many greener ways to drink coffee – and you’d be right.

      I have many many devices to make coffee with – but short of buying a full barista style coffee maker a cheap Nespresso machine by far and away makes the best espresso shot I’ve tasted.

      They are miniature marvels!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I love the new cuff links, as I have always had a soft spot for old maps. I totally understand that you look back at the past with regret, but think of all the experiences you would have missed out on if you had actually made different choices early on. I am pretty sure I would never have met you and Hayley. And you might not even have met that lovely lady that is currently at your side, because… well who knows? You might have decided to become a gym… ehm… what do they call men who frequent the gym? For women it’s gym bunnies. So… gym rabbits? No that sounds odd. Gym bears? ^__^” Well anyway, you get my point. 🙂 Rather than looking at all the things you have missed, look at all the things you have gained. Perhaps that will make you feel a little bit better?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I agree with Mar 100% 😊 Imagine if everything had gone swimmingly up until now and you ended up (SHOCK, HORROR) an ordinary, boring, non-geeky gym bear? Unthinkable!

      🤗

      Liked by 2 people

  3. I love your cuff links. I’m sorry to hear that you are still troubled by your past. Try not to look back as you have no control over the past and you are not going that way. You have transformed your life in an amazing and incredible way and as you say your future ahead is bright. That is the place to aim your focus.
    Have you heard of a book called The Chimp Paradox – the mind management programme for confidence, success and happiness. It was published in 2012 but I found it in Tesco in their book chart a couple of weeks ago. I’ve read about a third of it and am finding it a fascinating read. Interestingly one of the carers who came to my Carers Support Group tonight mentioned to the group she had recently been told about the book and it was helping her to deal with some issues. She said she bought a pdf version online. Perhaps this book might help you.

    Liked by 1 person

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