Baldy

I’m a true believer that pretty much every cloud can (with the right attitude) be found to have a silver lining. 

It’s all about perspective. 

Today I was treated to a wonderful dose of this on my walk home from work as I strode past a large group of rowdy looking teenagers. They were all clustered round a bench and I had no choice but to walk close by to them to get to the exit point. 

I don’t like gangs of kids. 

Not because I’m worried about being physically accosted – but because I always used to be verbally abused

This has let me to usually avoid all eye contact and try to become mentally invisible when I encounter such groups and today was no exception. 

‘Be a leaf in the wind Dave…’ I thought. ‘Just ignore them.’

I looked at my feet as I drew nearer and it was then that I heard them whispering. I glanced to the side and could see four of them were staring at me. 

Then I heard one of them say ‘on the count of three all call him…’

My heart sank. Really? Was this shit still happening to me? Can’t idiots like this just let fat people get on with their lives without abusing them in the street?

They drew in their collective breath beneath their hoodies…

Oi! BALDY!!!’ They all shouted in unison as I passed close by. 

I almost stopped to reply, thought better of it, and continued along my way. 

Although I’ll admit it wasn’t a pleasant experience I don’t think they’d have been satisfied with the grin they produced on my face as I continued on my way. 

‘Baldy!’ 

How great is that?! 

Eighteen months ago I’d have been a a ‘fat c**t’ or a ‘fat b***ard’ but now I’m just ‘baldy’! I no longer merit abuse based on my dimensions – now they have to pick on my challenged cranial follicles instead!!!

Now that’s progress!


Davey


8 thoughts on “Baldy

  1. Haha brilliant! I mean they’re a bunch of idiots of course but your reaction is fantastic. Have you heard of Weight Loss Bitch? She calls herself that because she’s aiming to get to the point where she’s only called a bitch, not a fat one 😁

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes I have! She did a guest speaker session at my slimming world group shortly before I started there – although I only found out about her similar philosophy this evening whilst talking with a friend on a walk about the post I was going to write!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Woah small world! I’m sure I remember reading about that talk on her blog. Unfortunately she doesn’t blog any more I don’t think, I miss her posts.

        I watched a TED talk online that she did about not waiting until you’re at target before you do stuff. Inspiring stuff!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. It was after reading her blog that I decided that I wouldn’t do ‘fake away’ foods – like where people make fake sausage and egg mcmuffins etc.

        I decided that she had the right attitude and if I maintained a taste for all the things that wrecked my health in the first place if I ever ‘fell off the wagon’ then I’d probably go back to my old behaviour.

        It’s because of this I don’t do fake kebabs or anything similar – just proper cooked meals with real ingredients and no emphasis on fast.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Hahah I love how you turned this into a silver lining. πŸ˜€ Awesome isn’t it that that is all that they could come up with? πŸ˜€ For the record: I really like the bald look on you. o.o It would be so weird to see you with a whole bunch of hair all of a sudden haha!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well thankfully I’m bald by choice – although the ‘choice’ window is closing fast πŸ˜„

      The main issue with long hair is that because of my ‘distinguished grey’ I look like Pauley Walnuts from the Sopranos when it grows (google him. You’ll see why I shave my head πŸ˜‚

      Like

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