Well – I think I have a flu victory of sorts. After a week where I mostly sat on my ass or lay under a duvet after eating more than I felt I should have I managed to maintain my weight.
Nothing lost – but thankfully also nothing gained.
I wondered how I’d feel about this – but the truth of it is I feel pretty good actually. It’s proven that the lifestyle changes I’ve made aren’t limited solely to exercise alone.
The contents of my cupboards and fridge will struggle to make me gain weight. It’s all fresh, unprocessed (with the exception of ham and bacon), natural and requires effort to turn into something resembling a meal.
Even a baked potato in my house will have to do without the finer things in life.
Butter? Doesn’t exist in my fridge. Grated cheddar? Nope, only low fat feta for salads and that block has been there for two weeks. Ready meal? Haven’t had one since April. Biscuits or cereal bars? Banned since I realised I ate them all in one go every time I bought them.
This sounds like a miserable, depressing, boring crappy kitchen right?
Some time ago it was a place of danger. It was somewhere I went to comfort eat, to rage eat, to drunkenly eat, to eat so I would feel sleepy, to eat because I just walked past the fridge and it crossed my mind, to eat because I was bored.
Now it’s actually a place of safety.
I look upon my kitchen as a children’s ball pit. Somewhere that I can just dive into without worrying about getting hurt or thinking too much about the consequences if I’m occasionally feeling reckless.
If I don’t order a takeaway there’s practically nothing I can do at home (apart from drinking a litre of extra virgin olive oil) that will majorly derail me.
This of course has limits.
I can’t eat EVERYTHING without consequence. I can’t binge eat (although I still struggle in this area sometimes.) If I want a meal I have to make it. I have to chop up the ingredients and cook it myself.
I’ve mentioned in the past that I’ve tried to avoid the fake takeaway food that you can make and stay on plan at Slimming World. This isn’t because I look down on it or think people other than me shouldn’t do it. It’s because I want to no longer crave that kind of stuff.
- JustEat – app deleted from my phone
- Dominos Pizza – app and number deleted from my phone
- Ming Kee Chinese Takeaway – deleted from my phone
- All Kebab shops that deliver – deleted from my phone
I see ‘fakeaways’ as training my tastebuds to keep thinking about the kind of food that’s bad for me. The kind that made me fat, that made me diabetic, that stopped me cooking, and made me feel like crap for hours after five minutes of joy.
I don’t want any substance that makes my goal of NOT WANTING THESE FOODS ANY MORE any further away.
So – this is why I see my kitchen as a place of safety now. This is why I see a maintain as a victory rather than a failure.
In a couple of days the flu will hopefully be completely gone and I can get back to the business of being well and walking again.
This incidentally is going swimmingly. As I mentioned in a previous post (here) I have a stated goal of walking from Land’s End to John O’ Groats (847 miles) over the course of my weight loss. At this rate I might get it done by Christmas if I put my mind to it.
The numbers from September have now been added to my stats and even with a slow week due to illness I’ve improved upon August’s total. Last month I managed just over 150 miles and 317229 steps.
This brings the total distance I’ve walked since I started Slimming World in Mid April to approximately 501 miles!
Now – I might be wrong but I think there’s an appropriate musical interlude required here…
(waits for readers to watch the video)
(Don’t worry – I have time. Enjoy it. It’s a good track)
Shortly after weighing in I went to a lunch at the Hatton Arms in honour of my friend’s 40th birthday. This morning I realised I’d annoyingly run out of birthday wrapping paper – and I was hoping when I parcelled them up that I hadn’t made them look too Christmassy!
My mate was looking happy and fabulous as usual – and she still appears seemingly un-ravaged by the winds of time, and hasn’t changed since we were young enough to know better.
I still can’t see a single grey hair in evidence – unlike myself! I’m sure in a darkened loft somewhere there’s a painting slowly ageing – or a Faustian pact that was made many years ago with a shadowy figure to ensure her eternal youth.
She wasn’t the only one though – and despite having children everyone (most of whom I hadn’t seen for a while) looked just as I remembered them.
When I noticed one couple I was instantly reminded of the last time we met (a 30th birthday party I think) – where we were rather drunk (praise the gods of strong cheap cider!) and all danced around in circles listening to ‘Jakatta – American Dream’ over and over at an unsociable time in the morning with way too much volume.
That was in 2001!!! How time flies…
As we chatted and discussed our mutual life events I passed on that recently many things had changed.
It seemed the right thing to do to lead my potted ‘story so far’ history with being recently made redundant (it seems important somehow) but honestly it was really just a way to say that it had been for the best, had changed my life in a good way and it led neatly into how I’m trying to improve my overall health.
This topic is something that felt at one time alien and embarrassing to me – and that a fat man should have the front to talk about nutrition, diabetes and food groups – or be passionate about a certain kind of eating regime seemed somehow wrong.
Now what I find this is what makes me conversationally come alive.
I overheard a lady earlier this morning in Slimming World say that she had finally found something that worked for her. Something that she felt comfortable with and trusted to get results.
‘Why wouldn’t I keep coming back even if one week was bad?’ she said to a friend.
It seemed like a no-brainer to her that whether she had put some weight on or lost it that she would keep going, and keep grinding away, because when she followed the plan it worked.
I feel the same.
When I skipped the starters, and my main meal arrived (chicken and bacon ranch salad) I knew I’d made the right choice. Sure – there were syns in the croutons, dressing, parmesan and probably the bacon (it looked streaky – not a medallion) but I made absolutely the best choice possible on a menu of things that could have done way more damage.
I passed on desert too. The cheesecake looked lovely though…
So it’s not about being the fastest to my goal. It’s not just about shifting tons of weight every week. It’s not even about how far I walk every month.
It’s making a conscious decision in every aspect of my life to make the right choices in the knowledge that ultimately this will improve my world and make me happier and healthier than I’ve ever been before.
So today internet I maintained my weight and I’m super super proud that I did.
I have loads of walks planned for the coming week and I plan to kick the arse of the scales next Saturday.
I’m SO gonna nail it!