This afternoon I feel really really good.
I can’t remember the last time I set myself a goal and not only met it but actually exceeded it.
I am officially an over achiever!
This week I’d promised myself that I would do 6 miles worth of walking before the weigh in on Saturday. Well I did that – and a bit more.
In fact I’m closer to 7 miles!
It turns out (thanks to the miracle of GPS) that Arrow Valley – which I circumvented twice this week is a mile and a half…
Strictly speaking however this is not a like for like comparison as (like St Nicholas park) I did a reverse loop today due to the lower availability of benches on the section near the children’s play park and boat house.
Getting this bit out of the way before my legs were dead was a good call.
It was really sunny today and while I wouldn’t normally set foot outside in this weather I covered myself liberally in factor 50 and just accepted my barely concealed brain would probably burn.
So did my poor arms which currently look like I body surfed the sun.
On the plus side Apple Watch reported an improvement today and the green exercise ring – which I thought had been broken since the day of purchase has jumped into life. For the second day running it has moved ever closer to eating it’s tail.
I may have to start looking at pictures of Kelly Brook while I walk.
Food wise the week has been good, and although I have felt peckish some evenings the food that I’ve snacked on has been pretty good for me and I don’t feel guilty.
However I also want to loose weight and I have the 2 stone mark in my sights. I don’t know if I’ll do it this week or next week but I’m hoping it’s not going to be far off.
I was talking to a colleague about this today and he reminded me that I shouldn’t have too high an expectation for my weigh in as bodies have a habit of setting their own agenda with weight loss, especially where exercise is involved.
He’s right. I know he is. But I still want to loose weight tomorrow. At the moment I want it with all my heart, although I am fully aware that wishful thinking doesn’t equal results.
Either way I’m feeling better and making progress.
I have to. It’s the only thing that’s taking my mind off work – which I can’t get out of my head.
I don’t know what I want to do next and feel under pressure to have an answer every time someone brings the subject up of what my plans are if/when we are made redundant.
It makes me feel like I should have a strategy, a CV, training planned, interviews lined up and be inches away from my new career.
Or do I take time off and get a dog like I originally wanted to?
I feel adrift – which is confusing to me as back in February I was ready to step off into the abyss without fear.
Now it all scares me and it’s wrecking my sleep.
My colleague (also suffering in a similar fashion) recommended Boots Sleepeaze to get a good night’s sleep under my belt and I’m probably going to try some.
After Googling it I see it is Diphenhydramine Hydrochloride and basically an antihistamine that has a side effect of drowsiness. Given the itching I get from sunburn this could be a win win situation!
Anyway. I will take the day’s losses and the days wins and file them under ‘life’.
There’s nothing I can do to alter the choices of my employer but there’s plenty I can do to improve my own outlook and capabilities.
On Monday we’ll know for sure as the axeman from HR arrives to address us all.
I hope that I’m bouyant following the weigh in tomorrow Internet! I’m gonna need it 😄
Keep your virtual digital fingers crossed!