What a difference a day makes.
Yesterday was a bad one. Today I already feel markedly different. Maybe it’s sleep, or maybe it’s because I’m not standing on scales, but I feel positive.
My cold knows it’s beaten as too – and its army of evil microbes are in full retreat. Unfortunately it’s still trying to burn as many villages and blow up and many bridges as it can before it vacates the cellular country it invaded. I’m still dependant on cough sweets and tablets. Its days are numbered though and I expect reports detailing its grizzly demise from my teeny tiny immune system generals any day now.
While I type I’m sitting in Starbucks in front of a huge bowl of Earl Grey tea and looking out at a blue, cloudy sky. It’s not too windy, and not too hot. It’s just nice today.
I’m waiting for a friend that I haven’t seen for years and this is one of the reasons I’m in such a good frame of mind.
Ooh ooh! Friend arrival! Back in a bit!
Well that was lovely.
There are few pleasures in life greater than meeting up with someone that for no good reason you’ve lost contact with, only to happily pick up from where you left off and then spent several hours chatting about everything and nothing.
My friend is smart, funny, self aware, and a great conversationalist who likes to talk just as much as listen. Curiously she’s also been going through her own set of significant life changes and despite the nature of them being very different to mine she appears to be just as keen as I am to explore who she is and what she wants from life.
Once again I’m moved to consider what a positive force honesty and openness can be, as the reason we reconnected was my blog.
This was yet another unexpected benefit of what’s been one of the most rewarding things I’ve done in recent memory. It has given me nothing but possibility and positivity when I needed it the most, and allowed me to come to terms with an awful lot in a relatively short space of time.
(author muses for a moment)
I just had a thought…
Maybe the universe has ALWAYS been ‘listening’ – but I’ve just not been ‘speaking’ before…
One of the often repeated mantras in the self build group was that if you do the same thing over and over you shouldn’t be surprised if you get the same result. Change is hard, and painful at times. Even though we may want a different life for ourselves, what are we ACTUALLY willing to do in order to make it happen?
In my case I still struggle with motivation – but I’ve realised that in almost all cases the key to maintaining a willingness to be different is human contact.
In every historical instance where I’ve isolated myself and withdrawn I begin to notice the wheels come off. The group dynamic has it’s place in reminding you that you’re not alone – but there’s no substitute for friendship and sharing your life with other people. They make you stronger and there’s nothing that you feel you can’t do when they’re standing behind you or at your side.
This is how I feel this evening.
Anyway – now I have to decide what delicious and nutritious meal I am going to make for dinner.
When my shopping arrived this morning I think the delivery guy thought he was at the wrong address. He’s been used for almost two years to delivering savoury snacks and ready meals to be washed down with box after box of wine and litre upon litre of cider.
Today was quite different.
Bag after bag of healthy ingredients rather than ready meals changed hands at the doorstep, and my jam packed fridge now has all I need for a week of salads, chillies, stir fries, pasta from scratch and appropriate snacking.
I have to be careful though. I am a creature of habit.
I don’t do variety if left to my own devices, and I tend to cook the same things again and again until I’m absolutely sick to the back teeth of them. In the past this has led to problems.
When I did the Cambridge diet I found one soup that I liked and pretty much drank that and nothing else for almost a year. The lady who sold me the supplies was always really concerned that she would have enough for me when I rocked up wanting more and more. Without it I would probably have starved to death.
Then all of a sudden – boom! I didn’t like it any more. No warning, I was just absolutely sick of it.
Shortly after my problems began and I started to slip back into old habits.
Something that’s encouraging at the moment though is the Slimming World private Facebook group that I’ve joined. They’re a vibrant bunch and they’re very very enthusiastic about posting recipes and pictures of their food.
My sister in law would freaking love them – I doubt they eat anything without recording it for posterity in Instagram. From a group of about 120 people I swear there were at least 10 breakfast pics posted today.
They certainly made me want strawberries and pancakes today, which i’m mildly surprised by. I don’t do pancakes even on Jif lemon day.
I was a little sceptical about this initially, but as the day has worn on I’ve realised the effort that they must have put into presenting it for others. The side effect of it is that they make it interesting for themselves and the variety is maintained.
So the next thing that I cook that doesn’t look like I dropped the plate from the top of my stairs I think I’ll join in. After all, group work isn’t group work unless you participate in it!!!
Who knows – if it doesn’t resemble Pedigree Chum then I may also inflict it on the people who are unfortunate enough to blunder across my blog as well.
Anyway – with all this talk of food I need to get cooking.
I’m playing childish computer games online with a mate later and I can’t be late 🙂
Love and munchies internet!